Showing posts with label Jonathan Gurney. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jonathan Gurney. Show all posts

Getting into University

I have a degree. It’s still in the envelope they sent it in, tucked away in one of my many ‘important document’ drawers and there it shall stay until my living arrangements become more permanent. 

The reason I say I have a degree is because this was not always the case. Once, not too long ago, I was in the same position as some of you are in. The grades I’d received were not nearly as good as the ones I had wanted and my future looked quite bleak. I didn’t think I would get in to any University and that I would be stuck working in some job I would hate for the rest of my life. 

That’s when my Dad dropped another piece of his, not always but sometimes, excellent advice. Talk to someone at the University. I scoffed at this because I felt that the people at the University probably heard hundreds of cases like mine and were probably used to turning them down. This is just one more example of me being wrong and being happy to admit it.

After some persuasion I sent an email to Murdoch and within a day (bear in mind I was in Zimbabwe at the time) I had a response. The email was very kind in tone and it outlined all my options about the various courses that were open to me, including a few that I had thought I wouldn’t be able to get into. Within 48 hours of receiving my results I had made my application to Murdoch, something I would not have thought possible when I had initially opened the results letter.

So the three important lessons that I learnt were: 1. Your results are never quite as bad as you initially think they are 2. Sometimes your Dad will know what he is talking about and 3. People at Universities (particularly Murdoch) are people. People that will happily help you if you ask. 

If you’ve just got your results and are feeling like all the opportunities have gone up in smoke, simply ask for help. In three or four years time you could have a fancy envelope with a degree in it showing up to your house too. 

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On being a Graduate


I decided to take an unannounced break from blogging as the end of semester and end of exams really took it out of me and I needed some time to recuperate. Never fear though, I have returned to give you your weekly bathroom reading. 

I received my final University results and to the surprise of everyone, especially myself, I had managed to pass everything. For those of you following my exciting story that means I have met the prerequisites for leveling up from undergraduate to, the far more prestigious, Graduate. Upon reaching this new stage in life a number of options become available and I would like to spend this post discussing them.

Immunity from Prosecution

I’m not a lawyer, or even remotely qualified, but I’m pretty sure the number of words in your degree title is the number of days per year you are allowed to act with full immunity from the law. So as I have a Bachelor of Arts in Security, Terrorism and Counterterrorism Studies with a Minor in Journalism and a Minor in International Studies, I get about twenty days a year where I can do as I please. Obviously though this only starts next year as they still need time to put my details into the system.

Instant Knowledge

This one is great. Basically anytime you are involved in a conversation/argument/debate/shouting at strangers in the street you are entitled to say, “Well from what I learnt at University before I graduated.....” and then you fill in the blank with whatever statement you think will win you the argument/conversation/debate/respect of strangers in the street. The best part is that no matter what you say it immediately becomes true because you are a Graduate. It is inadvisable to twist reality too much. 

Graduate Surcharge

From now on, whenever you perform any service whatsoever you can apply the “graduate surcharge”. This, again, entails adding up the number of words in your degree title but this time for a percentage. Mine, for example, is twenty percent and I can now add an extra twenty percent charge onto any service I render. The graduate surcharge, unfortunately, cannot be added onto any dealings with family members as they will likely just scoff and remind you that they used to change your nappies. 

Though these are all wishful thinking I have enjoyed being a graduate so far. I’m sure, when the realisation that I will have to get a real job and stop publishing rubbish on the internet sinks in, I’ll eventually start to have a predictable panic attack. When I do I promise to document it for you and write it up for this blog. 

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How I do it (Part Two)


I do realise the irony of having a blog post about my time management skills go up two days late. Please accept my sincere apologies and enjoy this rather late offering.

Midyear enrollments are fast approaching and Murdoch have asked me to do a post on one of the most common concerns people have when considering enrolling, namely that they won't have enough time to study. In this post I will address some of the issues I’ve faced, trying to balance working at a part-time job and studying full-time.

If you’re an international student you are entitled to work 20 hours a week during the semester and that automatically affects how you balance work and study. Honestly, it can be hard to make enough to live by with the work limit but if you violate the rule you can lose your visa. I have, on occasion, come close to going over so my first tip is make sure you and your employer keep a close eye on how many hours you have done each week. Below are a couple of tips that I’ve found useful for keeping my academic reputation up while making some money.

1. Flexibility 


When you take a job make sure it has flexible hours. Having fixed shifts isn’t a bad idea but when you are really struggling with an assignment, being able to swap shifts around can be a lifesaver. This also comes in handy during the exam period.

2. Savings
    Save up some of your paycheck every week. I’ve suffered quite badly when I take time off to study and suddenly I don’t have any money coming in. This is a serious problem when rent is due and you don’t have enough to afford groceries as well. Nothing impairs your ability to study like not eating.

    3. Avoid the trap

    Once you start earning money, life suddenly becomes a lot easier. The more shifts you work the more money you make, until you realise how exhausted you are from working and decide to skip class in favour of sleep. It’s an easy cycle to get into, one that I know quite well.
    Finally just remember that balance isn’t something you’re born with, you have to learn it. It sounds clichéd but practice really does make perfect. If you are really worried about if you’ll have enough time to study then perhaps you need to look at alternative options, such as part-time or external studying. All of which can be found on the Murdoch website.

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    How I do it (Part One)


    Midyear enrollments are fast approaching and Murdoch have asked me to do a post on one of the most common concerns people have when considering enrolling, namely that they won't have enough time to study. This post is more going to deal with balancing studying and having a social life and I will do another tomorrow dealing with work and University and how the two sometimes negatively interact.


    When you're doing a full-time degree there is no getting away from the fact that it does take up a significant portion of your average week. On the surface it may seem like you only have to be on campus for your contact hours, whatever those may be, but you also need to account for the time you will spend doing important activities such as tutorial readings, assignment preparation and the extra time actually writing an assignment can take. When you factor in any time you might have to spend working a part or full-time job and a few hours to spend with friends or family it starts to seem incredibly daunting.

    For my first few months at University I found creating a balance between the social life of living in the Village and the demands of my degree very difficult. I would either spend entire nights locked away in the library, researching for assignments or I would go to the other extreme and put all thoughts of studying out my head while I went out drinking with friends. Neither extreme was particularly healthy but I did find my balance and from that I came up with a few little rules to govern my behaviour and help me better manage my time.

    1. Have a set starting and stopping point

    I struggled at first because I would over-study and then be exhausted the next day for class. I would go up to the library around nine at night and not leave until two in the morning. Being tired meant that I was never really studying as much or as effectively as I could and so I never took in as much information as I should have. I did find that if I set myself a set time to start and stop studying that I would be much more productive in that burst, rather than being unfocused for a longer period of time. 

    2. Keep a calendar

    Buy a calendar. Write down the due dates for every single assignment and exam you are going to have for the semester. If someone invites you out, simply check the calendar. If there's a big assignment or exam due soon then you should probably be writing it or studying for it instead of drinking heavily. Combining the two is not recommended. 

    3. Have a study space

    If you share a house with friends, or live in the village, the chances are you are probably limited in your study space. While studying in a common space, such as your kitchen or living room, may work for a little while sooner or later someone will disturb your study flow. I personally like to use the library to study as you are surrounded by like-minded people and during the day there is a whole section devoted to quiet study.

    4. Put the books down and go outside

    Locking yourself away and studying for long periods of time is fine, provided you also get out of the house and do something completely unrelated to studying. I would often stop studying for an exam and simply go for a fifteen or twenty minute walk. It's amazing how much easier it is to study if you take such breaks. Likewise, after a big assignment is finished, take a day off and go to the cinema with friends, or go clubbing (I'm told that's what kids these days do). Dwelling on what you might have done differently in an exam or assignment is the most wasteful avenue of thought and time. 

    5. Relax

    University is not life and death, though it can sometimes seem like it is. If you don't think, for any myriad of reasons, that you'll make the deadline for an assignment then talk to your tutor. Nine times out of ten they will give you an extension. Though, you should never get into the habit of asking for them. Failing a unit or an assignment is also not the end of it all. There are always allowances to be made and ways of making the failed units up.

    I will be putting up the second post on this topic sometime tomorrow. Until then why not tell me what your suggestions for balancing University and your social life are?

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    The Power of the Zambezi

    Some of my fondest memories are going on family trips to Lake Kariba. Often we would spend a weekend, fishing and game spotting, and simply getting away from the city. Sometimes we would even spend entire weeks up there aboard big house boats and travel far across the lake for many days. I remember it as always being very relaxing to be so close to nature and be able to observe the animals completely at ease. The poem below was one we found in my dad's desk and that is now pinned to the cork board in my room.

    The Power of the Zambezi, by J. Edward Woodward

    Through the continent of Africa
    The mighty Zambezi flows
    Over waterfall, through deep ravine
    And where dense forest grows.

    But such might and power
    And so much frantic haste
    Through so many generations
    Has mostly gone to waste.

    So the heads of two great nations,
    Engaged with such accord
    To Dam this surging monster
    And the first skip of concrete poured

    Then fifty thousand Batonka people
    Had to move from their homes
    And the treasure of the wildlife
    No more this Vale could roam

    As skip by skip the Dam wall rose
    Inch by inch did the water.
    Animals and Human kind
    Would find their lives would alter

    But Nyaminyami the River god
    Was not pleased by this obstruction
    And twice in rage almost brought
    Mens efforts to destruction

    But in spite of many hardships,
    The Dam was at last complete
    And now folks from around the world
    Come to admire, this engineering feat

    So now a mighty lake appears
    Where once there was 'a stream'
    Filled with many kinds of fish
    from Tigerfish to Bream

    But this is not the climax
    Of this colossal river fight.
    For several million people now,
    Are getting power and light.

    So be at peace Nyaminyami
    You have not lost your power
    For now millions pay you homage
    Each day and every hour

    Any many climb the twisting road
    Up to the lookout steeple.
    To look across that massive lake and see
    Matchstick boats and matchstick people.

    And so great Lake Kariba
    They built a church near you
    Not only in memory of the dead
    But to inspire the living too.

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    "Then what?"

    When I was four years old I pretty much had the world sussed out. I knew where wind came from, I knew that girls were icky and I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was going to be a police officer, or a fireman, or an astronaut or some combination thereof. Now, at twenty-two, I've discovered that most of what I held to be true was not as cut and dry as I had thought.

    Sadly, time waits for no man and before I knew it I was only a semester away from graduation. The point is driven home whenever I talk to people and they ask about University. Usually the conversation goes something like this;

    “So you’re still at University?”
    “Yeah, well I’ve only got one semester to go.”
    “Oh great! Then what?”

    Then it all falls to pieces. The person stands there with their smile gradually becoming frozen and fixed while I stutter and mumble, increasingly desperate to say something that will satisfy them. Lately I've taken to making up complex lies that will get them off my back but if pressed I will confess to the truth, that I don't know what comes next.

    But if I've learnt anything so far it's that not knowing what comes next isn't the end of the world. Getting the piece of paper doesn't immediately guarantee you a job in your dream area but it's a start. Sometimes a start is enough, a vague direction instead of an explicit set of instructions. Now if only I could convince the people who keep asking me what I want to do with my life...

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    Why I can never walk home from Uni again

    I think it's safe to say that I have not led a particularly boring life. Most people my age have not had invasive medical procedures, been threatened by a dangerously insane Swede, performed actual feats of magic or gotten into fights with old ladies at the gym. In fairness most of these experiences are hardly things I've sought out and many is the time that I have really hated the situation that has fallen into my lap. True they are usually hilarious in hindsight and hopefully the event of which I am about to speak will become one of them.

    For those of you who know me well I don't really need to explain how I get to and from University on days that I have class. But for those of you who don't, strap in. It's going to be exciting. On days that I have class I dutifully load up my satchel, ensure that my fly is done up and then I walk. It's not a long walk, nor is it particularly difficult. There is a minor incline but once I had walked it a few times I feel I built up the stamina needed to get up it every day. The walk itself is not the subject of this little episode, rather it is the people I see.

    I like to listen to music, it makes a walk easy and sometimes I pretend I'm Rocky only without all the pointless running and getting into shape. Music also cuts down on the amount of thinking I'm able to do when I walk to Uni so that, when I finally get into class, my head isn't full of the usual crap like "I wonder what would happen if I had laser vision but I couldn't control it." Another feature of music is that it cuts down on the awkward interaction I would usually have to have with the people that are out watering their gardens or washing their cars. Normally I could simply nod, smile and maybe mutter a 'good morning' or a 'garden looks lovely' and then pretend that the song I was listening to had reached a particularly dramatic crescendo and I could therefore be excused wanting to draw out any subsequent dialogue.

    A few days ago I was making my way up to campus when I spotted an elderly lady walking out of her house and hacking vigorously away at some weeds. She looked up, spotted me and smiled. My earphones were in so I did my usual; nod, smile and then I made a perhaps fatal mistake. I waved. The old lady, perhaps mistaking this wave for some sort of secret handshake, started to gesture furiously at me. I was rather taken aback but as she continued to gesture I was able to work out that she was calling me over. Normal people would probably have a little alarm bell that would ring at this stage, warning them to simply pretend not to have seen her and continue along on their merry way. Sadly I don't.

    I paused my music, took out my headphones, looked both ways, and crossed the road to where the lady was still gesticulating furiously. Immediately she began to grill me as to what I was doing walking along this stretch of road, why I had a satchel and how frequently did I take this route. All of these I answered as honestly as I could, bearing in mind that I was beginning to run late for class. I'm not convinced that my responses actually meant anything to her as she waved them aside and began a five minute monologue about how frustrating her neighbours were and their efforts to utterly sabotage her garden. Like any person raised to be polite I made the appropriate, "Oh I never", sorts of declarations. The sort that indicate you sympathise with the person but that's really where it ends. This was to be mistake number two as she clearly took these to be oaths of loyalty and began showing me all the vandalism around her property and finally extracted a promise from me to keep an eye out for any vandals messing with her trees. Readily I agreed and then made my excuses to leave, thinking that would be the end of that. Unfortunately, as I learned today, it was not.

    While walking home from a productive few hours in the library I was spotted by the old lady and once again she furiously motioned at me to cross the road. With a sinking heart I did. When will I learn? It turns out the little old lady had sought legal advice from a friend who had told her she needed to catch the vandals in the act. She proceeded to drag me around her garden showing me hundreds of different cuts on her trees that, honestly, looked all alike and that she could have done herself along with a whole database of photographs of the various cuts. Then she told me all about her evil neighbours who were trying to drive her away and how they had poisoned her trees and were cutting them back. Halfheartedly, I asked why she didn't just report them to the local council and then her true madness was really revealed. While many believe in conspiracies as vast and varied as 9/11 being a hoax, Harold Holt being kidnapped by Soviets and Aliens secretly running the world, this little old lady had set her sights to a far more mediocre one. Namely that the local council was in league with her neighbour to get rid of her. I had unwittingly walked into the plot to an action-thriller except that instead of Bruce Willis and a pretty girl, I had an elderly lady who was probably a little bit senile. But oh how much worse it gets.

    During this conversation the old lady had clearly decided I was to be her agent in the black, her silent partner, the ace in the hole. She didn't just want to complain, she wanted to recruit me into her invisible war. So invisible, in fact, that she was the only combatant. She asked me if I knew of any surveillance cameras that she could purchase and I, due to not being google, told her honestly that I did not. Though if I thought that was to be the end of it I was mistaken. The little old lady pulled out a Filofax (who even uses those anymore?) and asked me for my mobile number, so she could contact me once I had researched surveillance cameras for her (something I never agreed to do). This is the point I am most ashamed of. This moment. For when she asked me for my mobile number I couldn't just say no.

    From day one I have had manners ruthlessly drilled into me to the point where, if someone were to stab me with a knife, I would probably apologise for inadvertently taking their knife with me. People may know me as sarcastic and sometimes rude but in social situations like this one my manners are the only experience I have to fall back on so when this little old lady asked me for my number I did the only thing I could. I gave it to her. Admittedly I had the presence of mind to give her my old number so, with any luck, I'll never hear from her again but she still managed to get me to write down not only her name, but all three of her mobile numbers and a blind system which would allow us to communicate without her neighbours finding out. Because, as she pointed out, they might open her mailbox and take any letters I leave for her.

    Genuinely at this point I feel I have only two options, the first is to simply take part in this insane little war against her neighbours and the second is to fake my own death and then take a different route to University every day.

    The really sad part about this story is that every single word of it is true.

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    Completing your first University Assignment (Part Three)

    The late but final part of this series is here. Any fool can drop an assignment in a submission box but here at Jono's blog we show you how to do it in style.

    Cover Sheets

    Your epic essay detailing the rise and fall of the fax industry will become an anonymous assignment when it goes into the submission box. Unless you've taken the time to build a close relationship with your tutor (or bribed them) they won't know who you are or what your writing style is. With that in mind you should make sure your name and student number is on every page of the assignment and, more importantly, that there is a cover sheet on there. Without one your assignment might spend days, bouncing from department to department, until it eventually lands on your tutor's desk and they immediately deduct 100000% for being late. Cover sheets can downloaded or found outside of your submission box. Online submissions usually require a cover sheet as well but tutor's are sometimes more forgiving.

    Referencing

    Remember that great quote you found and included on that fax machine assignment? The one that really brought all your points together in a way that you just couldn't manage? The one you forgot to reference? The one that you're now being accused of plagiarising? The one that lost you your place at University? Always check all your references are in place. Forgetting to reference isn't an excuse that will carry much weight. Also always check you're using the referencing style your professors want. Full referencing guides are available on the library portal.

    Turnitin

    This is a wonderful program that scans and compares your essay to its huge database and finds any plagiarism. If you simply copy and paste a whole section from Wikipedia then the chances are turnitin will pick up on it and you'll get caught. Not every unit requires you to put an essay through turnitin first but you should always check with your tutor. The important thing to note is that turnitin can take as long as 48 hours to get your essay back to you. Allow for this time because your tutor might not accept it as a valid reason for your assignment being late.

    Otherwise you've finished your first University assignment. Once you put it in the box do your best to completely forget about it. Stressing over what result you are going to get won't do any good. My advice is; clean up the mess from the hours of sitting in front of your computer, eat a healthy meal and then go out and do something fun. Regrets about what you should have done can wait.

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    Interlude: The hot hot heat

    It has been incredibly hot in Perth these past few weeks. Hot and humid. You toss and turn every night, trying to find the coolest spot on your bed and then wake up covered in perspiration. The rare breeze brings a brief respite that is gone all too quickly and you soon forget the feeling of being cool.

    Air conditioners can slow the problem, turning your room into a cell that you don't dare step out of, but they shoot your electricity bill through the roof so you become afraid to turn it on. Scared to step outside for fear of melting and scared to stay indoors for fear that the heat madness will force you to turn on the A/C and live out your life in cool poverty.

    The weather people keep telling us that it's a record heatwave, as if this is some kind of comfort, and that it will break soon. I have long suspected them to be simple charlatans who really have no idea of what something as mercurial as the weather will do next. That, or the one's in Perth are just terrible at their jobs.

    This weekend will apparently bring us light showers that will perhaps tide us over until winter is ready to hold us in her tender embrace. The phrase, 'beat the heat', is blared out in so many different adverts that they seem to forget that you cannot. All you can do is endure until it goes away, much like toothache or the flu.

    I, for one, will be lying in a bathtub full of ice until the situation remedies itself. I recommend you do the same.

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    Completing your first University Assignment (Part two)

    Welcome back to the topic that is most likely to put you to sleep. Unfortunately assignments don’t go away, no matter how hard you wish. They also don’t disappear with any sort of animal sacrifice and then all you’re left with is the stain in your carpet and the cloying scent of incense. But I digress.


    This part of the series will hopefully illuminate a little more of the processes that you can choose to try when you’re writing your first assignment. You can also choose to completely ignore the advice given here and opt for the pressure cooker method.

    Research

    I used to find this the hardest part of being a University student as, before I came to Murdoch, the most research I had to do for essays was to glance through my textbook. I learnt the hard way when it came to writing my first assignment. Thankfully the University doesn’t just hand you off without any sort of support. The library has a stack of easy to access online materials and there is the Student Support centre where you can be shown how to access it all. Add Google Scholar to the mix and you should have little problem finding relevant data for any assignment.

    A big part of learning to do proper research is learning correct referencing styles. The University has handy referencing guides up and it never hurts to ask your tutor which style they prefer. If you don’t reference properly you can lose marks or even end up accused of plagiarism. So, try to avoid that.

    First Draft

    A legal studies professor once told me that I should simply write an introduction and then never read it again until I’d finished the essay. That way I could delete the introduction and write a much more appropriate one when I was done. The hardest part of writing is actually getting started and with a first draft you just need to keep plugging away until it’s done. It doesn’t have to be perfect, or even good, once it’s finished you can start the distilling process.

    This is an important part and if you use a first draft you usually end up with a higher quality essay. It also helps you see what areas of your argument need to be improved and what areas don’t work at all. Write it, leave it for a few hours and then read it with a fresh mind. Failing that get a friend to read it and ask them what they think. Be prepared for sometimes harsh criticism. 

    I’m in the middle of my own assignments at the moment so this post will be briefer than the last. In the final post of this series I’ll hopefully talk about final drafts and submission. I might also bore myself senseless with those tasks and end up talking about more animal sacrifice. Half the fun is in the anticipation!

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    Completing your first University assignment (Part One)

    So hopefully you’re settling into the new and exciting world of University. By now you’ve probably already eaten at all the places on campus, argued with at least one person in a tutorial and felt the temptation to skip lectures. In my first few weeks at Uni I managed to completely overdose on energy drinks and ended up shaking so badly that I couldn’t take notes during one of my Foundation unit lectures. So, yeah. Don’t do that.

    By now the first deadline for your first University assignment is probably looming just over the horizon and you might be beginning to feel the pressure. Well, in the words of an immortal guide book, Don’t Panic. This series of posts will hopefully help you prepare and write your first assignment. 

    Read your question

    This seems really obvious and you don’t think it’s necessary but half of the process of writing the assignment is knowing exactly what you need to write. The wording of the question is key to how you plan and write your essay. We’ll discuss plans in a bit but first you must ensure you understand what your tutors are asking you for. The best part about being in first year though is that your tutors welcome any questions regarding assessments. They get a little less forgiving as time goes on so make sure you use this grace period to answer any of your questions.

    Plan your essay

    This is really only applicable for an essay so feel free to stop reading here if your assignment is different. When I was in my second year, studying Power of the Media and Public Opinion, I had the luck to be handed a formula for planning almost all essays I would be given. This was given to me by Dr. Ian Cook at Murdoch. In my role as mentor I now share this formula with you.
    There are four basic types of directive words that can form an essay question:

    1. is / can / does
    2. explain / outline / why / account for
    3. discuss / critically assess / critically evaluate
    4. to what extent

    The basic directive words are each accompanied by four basic essay structures:

    1. yes case - no case - my case  (not necessarily in this order)
    2. list
    3. model & analysis
    4. continuum

    The structures explained:

    1. There are only 2 answers available for an "is / can / does" type of question - yes and no. Both the yes case and the no case need to be explained but in the end an essay must make clear that its author thinks either yes or no or possibly both. This can be referred to as my case

    2. Explaining something might be to provide a set of reasons that it occurred or a set of things that someone needs to know about that thing in order to understand it. Outlining something involves indicating its identifying characteristics or principle features. When we are asked why something is so or why it happened or account for - we are usually being asked to provide reasons. Therefore we are providing a list.

    3. To effectively discuss/critically assess/critically evaluate something we need to provide an explanation of what we think that thing is. This explanation or replication is referred to as a model. Try to present this in an as convincing manner as possible. In the second part of the essay you will examine and focus on making sense of your model therefore analysing the first part of your essay.


    4. This is a fairly unusual type of question as it resembles the "is / can / does" type of question but does not require the simpler yes/no response. The responses available to a question of this type belong on a continuum. The simplest of which is one that includes 'to a minimal extent' at one end of the continuum and 'to a maximum extent' at the other end. A recommended approach to answering this type of question is by replacing the 'yes case' with 'reasons that the answer lies toward one end of the continuum' and replacing the 'no case' with 'reasons that the answer lies toward the other end of the continuum'. 'My case' should then be replaced with a section which establishes where on the continuum your answer lies.

    ** (The above structures must always be accompanied by solid introductions and conclusions) **


    - Dr. Ian Cook.




    This formula might not work for you but if it does then feel free to use it and share it with others. The next post in this series should be up on Wednesday the 2nd of March. Also remember you can email me at any time with anything you think I need to write about or anything you think I have forgotten. I also will try and respond to comments on the blog itself.

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    The Stress Less Guide to Studying in Australia - Part Three

    Orientation Week

    This one is coming a little later than I would have liked but I promise there will be a full explanation. Later. As always please leave a comment or email me if you have any questions or feel that I've missed something.

    So now that you’re in Australia, you’ve moved into what will probably be your home for the next three years and have met other people who are about to start University. O-Week starts tomorrow (or maybe today at the rate I’m writing) and soon you’ll be so busy attending introductory lectures and orientation events that stressing about the semester to come will be the last thing on your mind. This will be the conclusive post of this trilogy so pay close attention.

    Put your address on MyInfo

    One of the conditions for holding a student visa in Australia is that you let your education provider, a fancy name for the University you attend, know where you live. This is also kind of useful for you as it means the University can send you important notices and the like. It’s really easy to simply go to MyInfo on the Murdoch portal and pop your address in. All you need to login in is your student number and password that you should already have. 

    Get your student I.D

    It’s a handy little card that entitles you to the various discounts that students are offered. It also allows you to gain access to certain buildings in the University grounds after hours depending on your unit choices. All you need is your student number and the library will sort you out with a picture and a card. It does not, however, allow you to get concession on public transport, that requires a separate smart-rider card and to have registered for the concession on MyInfo.

    Enroll in Units and Activities

    Part of being at University is attending lectures and classes. To that end it’s a really good idea to enroll in the units that your major requires. The sooner you enroll in units the sooner you can enroll in activities (the classes that go with every unit) and the sooner you do that the better the timetable you end up with. It’s only logical. 

    Buy your books

    This can be the most painful part of your University career, having to shell hundreds of dollars for University textbooks and readers. There really is very little I can say that will soften this blow. (Again email me or leave a comment if you have something to add) Check the Guild shop for second hand books and sites like the Book Depository and Amazon will sometimes have cheaper books. Good luck either way.

    Conclusion

    If you’ve read this far and feel that there is still something that is worrying you then I encourage you to send me an email about it. Otherwise, follow your timetable, always read your Unit Guide, always take notes in lectures and always start your assignments on time. Also, stress less.

    Good luck!

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    The Stress Less Guide to Studying in Australia - Part Two

    Pre departure - Still
    Now that you have all the paperwork sorted out its time to start giving some thought to what you need to take with you. Again this won’t be an exhaustive list but feel free to leave a comment or send me an email about any suggestions you have.

    I like to travel light. If I can’t carry both my suitcase and my hand-luggage at the same time then I usually like to repack them. It’s a rule that’s served me well in the past, though it does say a lot about my life when I can fit it into a backpack and small suitcase. Luggage allowance on the flight to Australia will vary from place to place and airline to airline but I usually have about twenty kilograms to work with. Keep that in mind when you come to packing.

    Clothes
    The agreed upon rule on this seems to be pack the minimal amount. You’ll want summer clothes if you’re arriving in February and warmer clothes for June and July. The clubs usually won’t let you in unless you have smart-casual clothes and close-toed shoes, so pack appropriately. Anything you don’t bring with you can probably be picked up reasonably cheaply in one of the many clothing stores. There’s even a warehouse outlet called Harbour Town in Perth but I’m cheap when it comes to what I wear so rarely go there.

    Toiletries
    I honestly didn’t give them much thought but I have been told by both my mother and sister that this is an important section. You should take fresh bottles of all your shampoos and conditioners. It gives you a bit of breathing space for a few weeks and can also be a bit comforting when you first arrive. You’ll probably be able to get the same products or something very similar in the supermarkets and pharmacies but it’s still nice to have the same product as what you’d use at home.

    Computers
    Laptops are fairly cheap these days and are really easy to transport. I knew a guy that flew his entire desktop computer over with a printer and it cost him a fortune. If you plan to live in the Village at Murdoch then you’ll most likely have internet access through the ethernet port in your room but you can also get wireless on campus and in lectures. I like to use my laptop to take notes and often end up checking Facebook at the same time. Presumably you’ll be more industrious than me. Printers are also fairly cheap and you can get them in Fremantle and Perth.

    Books
    Unless you are really dedicated you probably won’t have any of your unit textbooks when it comes to fly across. The books I’m talking about are the sort you read for pleasure rather than the much dryer academic texts, unless that’s your thing. I usually travel with four or five books because I read so quickly but it can add to my hand-luggage weight. I suggest taking one or two books that are special to you, I know someone who has a treasured copy of Atlas Shrugged, and keep those with you throughout your University career. If you plan to go the Village route most of the rooms have good bookshelves in them, though you will probably have to sacrifice space to the dry academic texts.

    Mementos
    The most important thing you can take is something special that reminds you of home. When my sister went off to University she took her favourite stuffed animal, I took a few photos and my guitar and I know a friend who took enough photo’s to fill a wall. These objects are important for two reasons, first because you’ll need something familiar in the first few months and second because they can be very comforting if you get sick so far away from home. 

    That, as far as I can see, is most of what you should think about packing. I’ve probably left something very vital out so please don’t try to use this as a checklist. If you decide to use this as a checklist please don’t blame me if you forget something. If you decide to blame me please don’t kill me. If you decide to kill me please at least have the decency to not dump my body down a mine shaft. I get nervous in dark, enclosed spaces.

    Stay tuned for part three where I will show you how to make a cat out of macaroni!

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    The Stress Less Guide to Studying in Australia - Part One

    Pre Departure

    You’re on the cusp of moving to Australia for University and at this point you might be panicking just a little bit. Fair enough. This series of posts will hopefully help to set your mind at ease. It’s hardly exhaustive so there might be some omissions, if you notice any glaring ones feel free to make the addition in the comments or send me an email!

    Coming up to Christmas there are three things you’ll have needed to sort out that are very important. The first is your electronic confirmation of enrollment or “eCoE”. This is simply a document from your chosen University confirming that you definitely have a place. Good to have. The second thing is your student visa. Put simply this allows you unlimited exits and entries into Australia for the length of your chosen degree. If you don’t have one of these in your passport you probably won’t get into the country. Likewise good to have. Finally, something to sort out, is Overseas Student Health Cover (OSHC). Going off personal experience having OSHC was a condition of having my student visa so I presume it still is. 


    If you have any questions regarding any of this I recommend contacting your education provider. For future Murdoch students, all your contact options are here.

    Once you have those squared away it’s time to give some thought to where you are going to stay. Most Universities offer some kind of on-campus accommodation and the Murdoch University Village homepage can be found here. Just remember that there are other options available to you, such as those found here at Perth Student Accommodation (here) . I am not endorsing any of these choices, I personally lived for two years in on campus accommodation before I moved out. I liked living in the Village but, and I stress I heard this second hand, it has gotten quite expensive.

    If you’ve got all the documents sorted out and you know where you’re going to be living then you can breathe easy for a bit. There’s still a bit to do but most of the important stuff is out of the way. 

    To be continued in Part Two - Packing for a different life.

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    From the Horses Mouth

    On the 30 of October 2010 I received a phone call from my mother while I was at work. My father, Charles Jeffery Gurney, had suffered a fatal heart attack. A week later I stood under the hot sun in a garden in front of more than a hundred people and stumblingly read out a small speech I had written. These were the words I wanted to say, the words I needed to say. I’m going to put the speech, in its flawed entirety, below. I’m going through a tough time right now and it probably won’t get any easier any time soon but I promise you that I will make every effort to put up blog posts whenever I can. 



    Dad

    I can honestly say that I never believed that one day I would be standing here saying goodbye to my dad.

    Unsurprisingly it’s one of the hardest things I could never imagine. How can I really say anything that will capture even a fraction of the loss I feel right now and will probably feel for the rest of my life? So I think instead I’d like to just share with you a few things about my dad.

    In Form Two we were asked to write about one of our heroes. I remember sitting in the class room looking up at the whiteboard trying to decide if I would write about Nelson Mandela or Terry Pratchett when a little thought popped into the back of my head, “What about Dad?”. So that’s who I wrote about, because to me he was just as influential and just as heroic as those people. Three years later, in 2006, the old man proved me right when he flew all the way to the UK simply to surprise me for my Eighteenth Birthday. I wouldn’t have been any the wiser if he decided that it was too expensive or that he couldn’t take the time off but my Dad made the trip, because that’s who he was.

    Dad was a generous man who once explained to me that charitable giving was best done anonymously, because then you knew you did it for the right reasons and not for the recognition. Dad also had the mischief. He would look for the best ways to stir people up, whether it was dreaming up the Gnome Liberation Front to harass people at Cabs or convincing Auntie Karen, as he called her, that Zimbabwe didn’t have the moon. 

    So when it comes to saying goodbye the word gets caught in my throat. I’ve lost my father, my teacher and my friend. Today I mourn him. Tomorrow and every other day I will celebrate his life.

    I love you Dad.

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    Guest Post - Jennifer Louise Morgan

    My father passed away two weeks ago so the blog has gone on a bit of a hiatus. Luckily my friends have provided me with some guest posts in my time of need. 


    This next post comes from Jennifer Louise Morgan who had the pleasure of sharing a unit with me this semester. I teased her, annoyed her and generally made her wish she had never met me. Jen is an accomplished writer who has her own blog at Miss Jen and I really do encourage you to check it out. She also makes a superb Ramona Flowers.

    Remember to thank Jen in the comments or by sending her positive Karma!

    The real world says hello

    Finishing university can be described as both a wonderful and terrible thing. It is something that all students have to face at one point or another (there is a limit to HECS after all). The strange thing is I haven’t given it a lot of thought until now.

    For those of you who may not know me, I am Jono’s friend Jen. I have been asked to write a guest post for him while he is away (gaining his ultra secret super powers). There are many things I could tell you about myself, but I think the most relevant would be that I’m about to finish my degree.

    The awful realisation is dawning on me that I will actually have to find a real job- that buying Harry Potter paraphernalia and watching 30 Rock will no longer be a valid way to spend my evenings. The fact that I am about to walk into a world where I can no longer use student concession scares me to no end.

    Studying at Murdoch has been a fantastic, eye-opening experience for me. My degree has given me the room to learn, and explore all that I am genuinely interested in. I have met a diverse range of people, and made some good friends (Jono included).

    I am comforted by the fact that I am now taking away invaluable skills, ones which I hopefully will be able to put to good use (besides my mad ninja skillz, they didn’t need much development).
    If you hear about a local Perth girl in the next few months however, who has broken the record for eating the most chocolate, or claims she has successfully recreated all the spells in Harry Potter, you will know I have probably failed.

    But then again, if Murdoch has taught me anything, it is about finding new life experiences.
    Here’s hoping the real world is kind.

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    Breaking down the Barrier

    People often tell me that they’re surprised I’ve lived as long as I have. I’m not sure if this a reference to the amount of exercise I do (none), the number of people I seem to offend (lots) or simply a dig at my diet (questionable at best).

    The truth is I generally try to eat well. I’ll spend hours in my head planning out exquisite meals, full three course banquets that tick every nutritional box and should, in theory, make me a better person simply by eating them. I’ll settle, however, for a can of chicken soup and some toast made with bread that isn’t completely mouldy. 

    A big part of how well I eat comes from how much time I am willing to devote to my meals. While Jamie Oliver might be able to knock out a decent curry in thirty minutes and still have time to lecture people on the importance of eating well, I’m lucky if I’ve managed to find a clean fork after a half hour of rummaging. Finding clean crockery and cutlery is only a tiny amount of the time I use. I need to factor in time to allow things like potatoes to boil, to allow time for swearing when I realise I’ve forgotten to turn on the hob and boil the potatoes and finally time to allow for the amount of helpless weeping I’ll do when I scald my hand on boiling potato water. By the time I’ve cleared the potatoes off the floor, dried my tears and attended to my hand, my stomach is empty and I can hear the siren’s call of the tin opener. 

    Truth be told I am not really that bad a cook, though I have scalded my hand on hot potato water and developed a healthy respect for fire. I can make a variety of meals and I can make some of them quite well but still I find it hard to eat healthy. I’m certain much of it is laziness. I can make a pizza if I want one but I can also buy a frozen one for a fraction of the cost and that takes a fraction of the time. Factoring in the time washing up takes and you’re left choosing between something delicious that takes four or five hours and something that’s average and only takes twenty-five minutes. 

    So really, while the home-cooked meals can taste delicious and are much healthier, what it boils down to (get it?!) is that during exams and assignments I much prefer to eat the quick unhealthy food followed by a handful of multivitamins than take the long path. There is also the chance, however slight, that the multivitamins will react with the chemicals in the quick food and either kill me or grant me mutant powers. 

    Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go and run my poor scalded hand under the cold tap.

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    Shearing the Locks

    I usually use Hairess on campus to get my hair cut. When I say usually I mean that I have gone to them to get my hair cut for the past 3 years. I’ve not been wholly faithful, in fact there have probably been as many as 3 other hair dressers in my life in this time, but on the whole I prefer Hairess. 

    I guess most it has to do with trusting them. If someone is going to be waving scissors around my head I really feel that I need to be able to trust them. I was not always this paranoid but like so many of my phobias I developed it after a painful experience. It was 2008 and my hair was getting a little out of control, so I wandered down to Hairess only to discover they had no free appointments. Being the carefree youth that I was I simply thought, “Oh well, I’ll just go into Fremantle and get one there.” How I would regret that.

    I can’t quite remember the name of the place that I walked into but I remember thinking that it looked a little run down. I sat down in the chair and went through the usual routine of explaining what I wanted and the barber went through the usual routine of ignoring every word I said. Nothing really seemed out of place and we made small talk while he snipped away, I’m not usually the best conversationalist when someone is cutting my hair but I think its important to make an effort. The snipping stopped and I was expecting the clippers next. What I was not expecting was the barber to pull out an old fashioned razor and start hacking away at my hair.

    This continued for about five minutes and I just sat in horror as chunks of hair fell from my hair. Nothing in my prior life experience had really prepared me for this so I just sat there and smiled weakly while the barber continued his butchery. Finally he brushed the copious amounts of hair off my shoulders and let me get out of the chair with a haircut that looked like something I’d have gotten for joining the army. Nevertheless I paid the gentleman and stumbled out into the sunshine. I’d have paid more than $20 to get out of that place.

    So after that incident you’d have thought I would’ve learnt my lesson. Which is why I found myself in Fremantle on Monday looking for a hair dresser and hoping that I wouldn’t stumble into the same place as last time. This time I was lucky enough to find another place, a much more respectable place. The hair dresser at this new place was great but she had one small flaw; she didn’t talk at all. A hair-cut without chatter is simply fifteen to twenty minutes of being forced to stare at your reflection while someone cuts your hair and occasionally moves your head. It’s a form of psychological torture and I would not condone using it on anyone ever. Not even the barber that attacked me with a razor.

    I guess the point of all of this is that I’ve learnt my lesson about going to hair dressers that don’t work at Hairess and apparently people will sometime cut your hair with old-fashioned razors. Avoid these people.

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    Jobs

    The world runs on money. If you have money then anything you need or want in the world can be bought or rented. If you don’t then go away and come back when you’ve found some money. Finding money can be accomplished by many varied activities; you can beg, borrow, steal or earn. As I have too much pride to beg, no rich friends to borrow from and my ability to steal is only matched by my ability to update a blog on time I am forced to seek out gainful employment.

    Work can be a deeply demoralising experience which is why its so odd that finding a job can be so difficult. If you’re at all like me then you probably have an updated resume that you can print off to give to prospective employers. So you print out a couple and then spend a day wandering around to stores you quite like, making sure to hand them out to people who will hopefully give you a job. Each time you will probably be politely told that they have no vacancies until the rejection begins to make your ears ring. 

    So you print off a few more and resolve to slightly lower your standards for a part-time job. After all, you’ll reason with yourself, working at a comic shop would be great but a book store is just as good. Sadly these places will also be overstaffed and you’ll return to your flat with a bag full of resumes and broken dreams. 

    Finally you’ll break down and start applying for the hospitality jobs that you’ve so desperately avoided. Usually these involve long hours, fairly low pay and dealing with some of the rudest people in the world. The likelihood of getting one of these jobs is much higher than it is of getting one of the jobs you want. Strangely enough though these jobs can also be the most rewarding. When you go out of your way to help someone or fix their order so its just right it can be a good feeling to be thanked by someone who really means it. 

    I guess the morale of the story is that you shouldn’t shy away from the hospitality jobs as they can be great. That and you should plot to kill employees anywhere you want to work ahead of applying for a job there.

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    The Proper Care and Maintenance of a Mouse Trap

    Sometimes, I like to take a break from saving the world to actually attend some lectures. However I've noticed that a lot of people tend to be breaking the unwritten guidelines of behaviour during these sacred times. So what follows are some of what I consider to be the more important ones.

    Snoring

    Falling asleep in a lecture is pretty common. Sometimes it's because you've been up studying all night and other times it's because a darkened room is very conducive to sleep. I have nothing but respect for the noble state of the sleeping scholar. Their gentle nods of the head, the hunched way they sit over their notebook and the startled look on their face when the lights come back on at the conclusion. However the snoring scholar is something I believe every lecture can do without.

    Eating

    It's five p.m. You've spent the whole day in the library desperately scribbling away to get your paper on 19th Regency era Romance Literature finished before your next class. You haven't had time to eat because you've barely had time to sleep. Finally you drop the assignment into the box and head to the final lecture of the day. You sit down, barely able to keep your eyelids open, and someone sits next to you. They pull out a sandwich they have obviously just purchased from the food court. Its smell is intoxicating. You believe that you could subsist entirely on the mere idea of this sandwich. You lean over and gently bash the owner of the sandwich unconscious and claim your reward. This is why I advise against eating delicious food during lectures.

    Keyboards

    I am actually guilty of this one myself. I like to take my laptop into lectures so my notes don't devolve into doodles of penguins and spaceships. I respect that some lecturers dislike seeing laptops open during lectures as they believe, sometimes quite rightly, that students will fritter their lecture time away by idly clicking 'refresh' on Facebook. I have no problem with this. My problem rests with the personality type known as the “aggressive” note-taker. This person will tap away at their keyboard as if every single key has committed a grave sin against them and must be punished. It would be an exaggeration to say that it can be hard to hear the lecturer but honestly it's still pretty intrusive.

    Talker

    Finally we come to the talker. This person hasn't seen their friend in forever and will engage in an energetic conversation with them about topics as diverse as politics, literature and whether or not one of them saw what was on the telly the previous night. Catching up with friends is an activity I wholeheartedly endorse. Catching up with friends when the lecturer is attempting to explain the finer points of a topic is a crime I would welcome the death penalty for.

    So there you have just a few simple rules that really do make me sound like an old man complaining about the kids on his lawn. I only have this to say in my defence; in at least one lecture in all my time at Murdoch I've been in breach of all four of these guidelines. And yes, the title is completely misleading and unrelated to the topic.

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    Perth, WA, Australia
    I live in Perth and this blog is about navigating that life in my own way.

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